Social Health: Does Friendship Matter More Than Fitness? | Emily Paulsen & Florence Wlodarski
We spend so much time talking about physical health—our steps, our workouts, our diets. Mental health, thankfully, is getting more attention too. But there's another pillar of wellbeing that’s just as essential, and it’s one we often forget:
Social health.
Recently on Curious Life of a Childfree Woman, I spoke with Florence Wlodarski, co-founder of Parallel Social Club, about how our friendships shape our energy, our health, and even how long we live. It was one of the most affirming and surprising conversations I’ve had on the podcast—and I’m still thinking about it.
Florence has built a growing community for adults living a childfree lifestyle who are craving deeper connection and more intentional friendships. In this episode, we explored what social health really means, how adult friendships evolve, and why building meaningful relationships is one of the most powerful things we can do for ourselves—at any age.
What Is Social Health—and Why Does It Matter?
Social health is a simple but powerful idea: it’s about the strength of your relationships and the quality of your connections. Not how many friends you have, but how supported, seen, and connected you feel in your day-to-day life.
Florence shared some powerful research that blew me away—especially the long-running Harvard study on adult development, which found that the strongest predictor of happiness and longevity wasn’t exercise or diet or income. It was close, supportive relationships.
That’s right—friendship might matter more than fitness.
It made me wonder: if we know connection is this essential to our wellbeing, why don’t we treat it like any other health habit? Why don’t we build it in, schedule it, or get support around it the way we would with a gym membership or a therapy session?
The Loss of Social Containers
One of my favorite parts of our conversation was when Florence talked about “social containers”—the built-in spaces we used to have for meeting people: school, dorms, sports teams, even office culture.
As we get older, especially for those of us who are childfree, those containers tend to disappear. We’re not meeting people at PTA meetings or kids’ birthday parties. We’re not surrounded by classmates or coworkers five days a week. And without those built-in systems, it’s easy to feel isolated—even if you’re not physically alone.
That’s why Florence started Parallel. It’s a space for people who aren’t parenting to gather, connect, and build something new together. From small group dinners to big events around LA, they’re reimagining what adult friendship can look like—and helping people find their five.
Find Your Five
Florence introduced a concept I haven’t stopped thinking about: Find Your Five. It’s based on the idea that you become the average of the five people you spend the most time with—not just emotionally, but physically and spiritually too.
When we think about our five, we can ask:
Who lifts us up?
Who makes us feel more like ourselves?
Who brings joy, ease, or depth into our lives?
And just as importantly—are there relationships that drain us, or keep us stuck?
This isn’t about cutting people out. It’s about awareness. It’s about taking stock of who’s in our orbit and making intentional choices about how we spend our energy.
Curious About How to Improve Your Social Health?
If you’re ready to invest in your social health but aren’t sure where to start, try these small but powerful shifts:
Audit your circle. Ask yourself who you turn to when you need support, advice, fun, or presence. Who’s missing from that list?
Start with one. You don’t need a huge group. Invite one person for coffee, dinner, or a walk—and bring a question that sparks real conversation.
Look for depth, not just activity. A packed social calendar doesn’t mean meaningful connection. Prioritize the people who see you.
Practice consistency. Just like any health habit, connection takes intention. Schedule it. Protect it.
Be the friend you want to find. Generosity, presence, and follow-up go a long way.
Let’s Stay Curious Together
This episode reminded me that social health isn’t optional—it’s essential. And it doesn’t take grand gestures or perfectly planned parties to build it. It starts with a little intention, a little courage, and a lot of heart.
So I’ll ask you what I’ve been asking myself: What does your social life look like—and is it supporting the future version of you?
If the answer feels a little uncertain, you’re not alone. Let’s explore it together.
Come join the conversation on Instagram:@curiouslifeofachildfreewoman. I’d love to hear your thoughts on friendship, social health, and how you’re finding your people—whatever your life looks like.
